Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Staying In The Moment

I always feel wistful for the amazing life and  adventures I was blessed to have in my early adult years or dream with longing of the possibility the future may yet hold for me, for my family. Yet, greater than my desire to have adventure, more pressing than my need to travel and be involved in something bigger than my own little life, is my desperate hope and desire to be present for and available to my children. To not get so caught up in the everyday struggle to just keep up with life and juggle the responsibilities of each day, that I miss the little moments and opportunities to connect with each of them. To hear them and to be aware of them and what they are going through. In fewer years than I am comfortable thinking about, they will be grown and creating lives for themselves and what they will carry with them from home will not be memories of how clean (or completely not clean) our home was, or if all of their school projects got turned in on time, or they had the coolest clothes, they will remember if I never had time to hear about their day, or if I was there when they just needed to cry and be held, or when they wanted to get away just the two of us. It is so easy to miss those little moments. My older son tends to be passionate about whatever he is into at the moment, almost to the point of obsession, and I admit freely to having a short attention span when he is describing every detail of the new video game he is excited about, but I will not miss the chance to be available to him. The fact that he wants to talk to me is not lost on me! I will not miss that moment. I will make myself interested, because I want him to know I am always available. Not easy. But it has to be my priority. Lord grant me the eyes to see my children, and the ears to hear them, and the grace to stay present amid all the responsibilities calling my name. They hold my heart, and I want them to know.  

1 comment:

Gretchen said...

As you also hold my heart!